let’s try this again. and again. and again.


i woke up this morning feeling like garbage.

not cold or flu sick but a sort of self-inflicted illness due to poor sleep, not enough water, too much junk food & sugar & very little movement.

i could barely get out of bed & this is the third sunday in a row that i’ve felt this lethargic. and i’m not hungover either – in case that’s what you’re thinking.

in fact i only had one tiny glass of wine at the ballet last night… but i did have some really salty junkie food & a massive coke zero before bed.

which lead to barely sleeping last night. i had the worst stomach ache, these weird shooting pains in my leg & a big old headache in the morning.

actually afternoon – i didn’t get out of bed until noon. which gives me only 7 hours to enjoy my sunday before i go to bed (super early since i get up at 3am for work).

and that is so sad to me.

i’m wasting my time because i’m treating my body like garbage.

other than my dog, how i treat myself & how i spend my time matter most & i’m not being intentional with either one at all.

every week i say i’m going to get healthy, buy better groceries, get more sleep & start getting serious.

but by wednesday, i’m usually so exhausted that i crash on the couch after work & order in food. i eat those salty, high fat leftovers for a couple of days & then it’s the weekend.

where i drink way too many lattes, more junkie food with my friends & stay up till 2am – completely throwing off my sleep & my stomach.

sunday & monday i feel absolutely terrible & nap a lot & then by tuesday i’m feeling okay.

but after that wednesday hits & i hit up my favourite thai place for spicy noodles & deep fried tofu again.

now i don’t think the problem is going out on the weekends with my friends – that’s actually something i’m trying to actively do more after being such a homebody for so long.

i believe the problem is my monday to friday. that’s where i really need to make some serious changes that i’ll stick to.

so this week i’ve committed to:


– filling out a completely honest food diary

– picking out a few healthy recipes to make at home

– buying better snacks & fizzy water to reach for in the afternoons

– limiting myself to one takeaway meal this week

– following the alarm that goes off when it’s time for bed

– drinking enough water


but the biggest piece of this is that now that i actually have a little bit of a plan & i’ve put it up where others can see… i’ll be more accountable & it will up my chances of sticking to this.

wish me luck!

xxoo, k

10 thoughts on “let’s try this again. and again. and again.

  1. Writing it down foes make it more concrete. Don’t forget about prepping your meals for the week. It might help when the cravings for salty food hit.

  2. DON’T drink Coke Zero right before bed. It’s full of caffeine. Get enough sleep. Take vitamins. I hope you feel better soon. You deserve to be happy.

  3. The challenge of finding purpose to keep us on the path to self actuation. It is in our struggles that we rise from our circumstances and find success! Keep battling!

  4. Zero Coke Zero @bedtime. It has more caffeine than a large coffee. Self punishment is normal, but you need to start looking after yourself. You can do it! Take care.

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