just don’t

what’s the very BEST advice that your mom ever gave you?? or maybe your dad?

in our home, my mama was always dropping wisdom & she’s still the first person i turn to, to vent or get some perspective on tough situations.

well, she said something when i was a little girl that i continue to fall back on even now as a woman in my thirties.

i was being picked on for something or bullied about something (i don’t actually remember what it was) & when i came home crying, she said to me ‘well if they don’t like it, they don’t have to look at it’!

now as somebody who has spent their entire professional career in the public eye & shares their journey & most vulnerable moments on the internet – i do open myself up to a lot of opinions & criticisms.

not everybody is going to like what i do or say & sometimes people feel the need to tell me they don’t like me or something about me.

and that’s fine.

honestly. we all have opinions, thoughts & we can make our own conclusions about what we like & what we don’t like.

but if you really don’t like it – you don’t have to look at it.

nobody’s forcing you to, it’s not your job, you’re not getting paid to do it, so you simply just don’t have to look.

turn your attention to something you actually do like.

for example, there are tons of social media accounts that don’t make me feel great about myself.

and that’s on me, that is my issue.

but if i don’t like it – instead of making a rude comment on that page or messaging that person to tell them i don’t appreciate what they’re doing – i can just unfollow that account.

i don’t have to look at it.

just like i don’t have to wear anything i don’t like.

i don’t have to eat anything i don’t like.

listen to anything i don’t want to.

read or watch anything that i don’t want to.

if there’s something in my house i’m not liking, i can donate it or change it or chuck it in the recycling or garbage.

***if it’s something to do with your job – you may not always have this option & i realize there are things in life we all have to do, like dentist appointments & paying our bills***

but please remember that life is so precious & so short & i feel like we could all take a page from my mama’s book… if you don’t like it… don’t look at it, wear it, eat it, do it!

so let me know in the comments below something that you have worked to change in your life… or leave the best advice you’ve ever gotten from a loved one!

and one more time: remember, you don’t have to look at it!

this convo continues on the afternoons with harley facebook, twitter & instagram accounts! see you there!

xxoo, k

5 thoughts on “just don’t

  1. The best-paying job I’ve ever had was also the worst. My boss was a full-on psychopath who took pleasure in screaming at me for literal hours in her office, for crimes such as addressing an email about an event to the event’s manager (turns out my former boss liked to control information and decide who got to know what when). I quit my job and went back to freelance writing. When freelance writing was preventing me from writing my books, I quit that too. There have been scary moments, but I’ve never once regretted leaving that job. She could offer me a million dollars and it wouldn’t be worth it.

    My mom used to say–from her dad–“You wouldn’t worry what people thought of you if you realized how seldom they did” and “You can have everything you want, just not now.” That last got me through some lean times.

    1. gah!! some people are so miserable 🙁 i absolutely love ‘if you realized how seldom they did’… that makes me feel braver – like i have nothing to worry about!!

  2. My dear 93 yr old mom is a wealth of wisdom and information. I have always suffered from poor self esteem. I freeze if I have to speak in front of an audience and I find it difficult to meet new people or make new friends. The easiest way for me to accomplish any of these things is to remember what Mom says. She would always tell me when I worried was it’s their loss. They don’t know what they are missing. This is mixed up sorry. I hope you get what I am trying to say.

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