have you ever felt good & bad at the same time?
like happy but still kinda sad all at once?
it’s a weird place to be… but here i am…
this long weekend i’ve had lots of down time to go through old notebooks & old pictures on my phone (telling myself i’m decluttering of course) & now i just feel confused.
in a big way i still feel a deep sadness over a major chapter of my life ending.
and in another way, i know that i needed to go through what i went through, so that i could start this new journey.
i guess things are turning out pretty okay… i mean this has been hard, but i honestly don’t think i would go back & change much of anything.
i feel good right now with the way things are, but not great (at least not yet).
but i do know myself more now & i can trust myself to make better decisions.
like the decision to start this blog & share my story.
or the decision to choose myself again & again & stop putting my needs or wants on the bottom of my to-do list.
you know – switch up the priorities a lil bit.
i just feel like there’s something more out there & something bigger i’m supposed to be doing.
maybe i did go through all of this so that i would have a story to share & a way to help people while helping myself become a better person.
and i do feel like i’ve made huge strides towards being a better person & living a better life that i absolutely love & enjoy.
even if i am in a super weird place right now, i am becoming happier & healthier each & every day.
and that’s enough for me.