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coming back

did anybody else’s june feel like it just went on forever & ever??

the whole month seemed so emotional & to be honest – kind of terrible – & i feel like it sucked everything out of me, including my creativity & my desire to write anything.

which was maybe a good thing… i spent the time doing a lot of research & inner work & took a really hard look at the world & everything that’s going on.

and while i do feel really good about that & intend to keep learning & educating myself – i also feel like it’s time to write again.

it hit me in the shower this afternoon, that i was ready to just put some words out there!

plus i do love the start of a new month – a fresh start – which is kinda my thing!

and a fresh start, or a restart, is exactly what i need after feeling so sluggish lately – mentally, physically & emotionally.

but at least i realize it & want to change it, instead of wanting to wallowing in it.

and i also sort of expected to feel ‘off’ in june.

it was pretty hard for me, not just because of everything going on in the world, but personally it’s a bit of a strange month for me.

june 20th marked one year since Harley’s cancer diagnosis. june 22nd is her birthday. june 24th is the day i lost her.

not my favourite week of the year.

for nearly a decade she was my whole world & was by my side through some of the biggest moments in my life as well as the ones that completely stopped me in my tracks & broke my heart.

she was my daughter, my best friend, my everything.

and i don’t think i will ever be able to explain what she truly meant or means to me.

even if i adopt or rescue a hundred other bullies in my lifetime – she will always be my heart.

so this last month meant a whole lot of tears, a whole lot of midnight margaritas & just kind of keeping to myself.

back when i had to say goodbye to Harls, i was at my all-time lowest low.

now, i can honestly & 100% say that a year later, i do find myself pretty happy & i can’t believe how different everything in my life is.

and i know moving forward that no matter what happens or how dark or miserable life may become again – it will eventually get good again.

i may need help & support from others & a ton of time, but one day things will turn around & i will be myself again.

i might just be a very different version, living a very different life.

so, i hope you all are doing well & taking care of yourselves out there & thank you for all the messages checking in on me – this community is the sweetest & i feel very lucky to have you all!

and as always – if you ever want to chat, feel free to leave a comment below, send a message or join us on facebook, instagram or twitter!

xxoo, k

2 thoughts on “coming back

  1. Great to see you writing again Kahla.also, very happy that things are going much better for you and that you are at a good place at this time. It is always important to have that support from a good circles of family and friends.
    We all have a story to tell and it is great that yours is getting better.
    All the best on your fresh start .

  2. Welcome back. It is good to see you writing again and more positive. You are on a long journey towards healing. Be with your family and friends and ask for help if you need it. Happy you are finding some peace of mind tho

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